Why the Lightning Gun will destroy Doom

  • Published on Friday, 14 October 2016
  • In the Member Blogging Category

It's pretty badass. Sadly, it's too badass.

I’m going to come off as the undisputed king of hypocrisy throughout the course of this article, because I love the Lightning Gun. I love most of the guns. I love Doom! Sorry, getting distracted… But, just like Hannah McKay in Showtime’s blood-gushing thriller Dexter, something with rose-petal beauty can be unassumingly deadly.

For most of the 50 hours of Doom online gameplay time I’ve clocked up, I’ve exercised stress relief using the Combat Shotgun and Rocket Launcher combo – quite happily too. Then, one night, I thought: “Kay, kinda bored of killing EVERYBODY with these things now. Let’s try this…”.

I clicked on the Lightning Gun. And, oh, did the game get easy. Like that morally-loose chick on that dating site earlier this year in-need of sexual servicing – it got easy reeeaaal quick.

Just, watch this short clip. It’s a fraction of the hell I’ve introduced to the Doom community with my new favourite toy:


Here are some things you should’ve picked up from that dollop of pure gaming magic:

Aiming? What aiming?

Those diehard competitive Counter Strike folk would be on the floor having a stroke if they saw that footage (or, just, go red, smash their clenched fists on the keyboard and scream something in Russian. Whatev’s.). Mainly because I was making everything fall over and die with little difficulty.

I killed all four enemies using the Lightning Gun’s secondary function, which is essentially its version of a flak cannon-like attack. You aim somewhere around the enemy (provided it’s against a surface), fire, and the jolt of lightning creates an electrified field, damaging all enemies in its radius.

Ergo, people struggling with arthritis in their mouse-hand can rejoice – they no longer need to try and aim.

The slow ammo depletion was great! Uhh, for me…

In the clip, I began my one-man-massacre with 191, uhh… lightning bullets (is that right?). By the end, I had a little leftover in the tank.

There are a few considerations here. We don’t know how much HP my victims had before I splattered their guts over the pretty textures. Also, and this one of the Lightning Gun’s mood-killers: the glorious secondary fire consumes 2x as much ammo. Re-watch the clip and check the ammo meter to see.

This drawback isn’t exactly a scary deterrent. With ammo drops littered all across the arenas, it’s incredibly easy to top-up-and-go, continuing your unrelenting electrical rampage.

If you can aim, the primary attack is also insane.

Okay – I didn’t feature the primary fire in my clip. I’m sorry. For those yet to succumb to the Lightning Gun’s beauty, the primary attack function is what it says on the tin – a jolt a lightning. With it you must hit your opponent directly to inflict damage and it doesn’t consume twice as much lightning bullets as its counterpart lightning field attack.

The jolt range.

Take notice of the third victim in my clip. The range of the lightning jolt was quite lengthy, and yet I could’ve been launching my assault much, much further away and still connected. Apply this range to the secondary electricity field attack and you’ve got yourself a surprisingly spammy weapon. Not convinced? The following snapshot and the weapon’s range seen in it should raise a few eyebrows:

Lightning Gun

It’s all wonderful… as long as I’m the only one using it.

If you’re already scared of this weapon’s potential, you haven’t seen nothin’ yet.

Nope – not the damage output, or the lack of aim required, or the economical ammo consumption. The aspect of the Lightning Gun that’ll really make you revisit your bed-wetting days is, in-fact, its eroding exclusivity.

Eventually, inevitably, the online Doom faithful will repeat what I’ve done. One-by-one, each of them will equip it, march into battle with it, destroy everything in their path with it, and realise it is the resurrection and true meaning of the word ‘leet’. (Because ‘amazeballs’ ain’t got shit on leet).

And that’s a huge problem. Who wants to play a game where everybody just runs around using the most overpowered weapon? Everybody will be stalemated in the most monotonous multiplayer experience conceivable. Which sucks, because Doom is an immaculate masterpiece of modern video gaming; an instant classic and the best gaming reboot of all time.

It will get nerfed eventually – its ‘wow’ factor must be sacrificed. It has to be – for the good of the game, its longevity and drawing power.

Best get my fill before it all turns to shit then. Time to launch Doom and light some suckers up.

Written by throzeN!`

Excessive Forces Founder and Clan Leader

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